November 15, 2019
Kingdom of Stonetree Broadcasting Ads 1
A typical commercial break on a radio station in a Fantasy Kingdom called Stonetree. You'll find out which carpet to buy, where to get swords, potions, or a job, and who to call if you get into legal trouble. Direct any questions or comments to [email protected]
Here's the script that was used to create this episode:
Ad #1 Luxury Flying Carpet: The 1319 Alatar Gryphon
(Classy low music)
Announcer: Introducing the all new 1319 Alatar Gryphon- elevating the magic carpet from conveyance (pause) to artform. The Alatar Gryphon, woven from the finest silk and powered by premium spirits from the elemental plane of air, it provides an absolutely smooth ride through any night sky. Starting at just 1199 gold pieces per month and with 0 percent financing for the first 60 months, the question isn't can you afford the 1319 Alatar Gryphon, (pause) but can you afford to be seen flying anything else? Alatar Flying Carpets, made with enchantment. 1199 gold piece per month and 0 percent apr offer based on credit check, not compatible with some other offers, see participating rug merchant for details.
Ad #2 Potion Shop- Seija's Alchemical Emporium
1: - and my elbow's been really bothering me, and I'm pretty sure I've contracted trollpox, and I think these aren't freckles, but a colony of micraoscopic skin pixies, and-
2: (Interspersed) Oh. Uh huh. 11aYeah. You ...